I’m thankful though that God has reminded me again and again to not allow these things to break me down. To not allow the enemy to trick me into a skewed view of the world as being dark and hopeless. Even when black clouds are all around, the sunbeams that pierce through are all the more beautiful juxtaposed against the surrounding storm. I feel after some of the lowest, hardest times I’m moving into a time of greater appreciation. Being thankful for the little things in life as well as the big. Losing a friend a few months ago reminded me to be thankful for something as basic as my body working as it should. There is so much beauty to be thankful for if we just have the eyes to see it.
I’m learning gradually to give things over to God and little by little not be overwhelmed by the hardships I see in the world and in my friends lives. At the same time through my own experiences of pain, doubt or inadequacy, God has been developing compassion, empathy and understanding for others. In this I don’t just view injustice and hardship from afar but can empathize and encourage others in a better.more real way. At this Christmas time I’m again reminded again how Jesus chose to be born into the ghettos and not into the palace. He lived among others in their struggles and didn’t just know what injustice and hardship felt from a far, he experienced it up close.
As my spectrum of reference has grown I find myself becoming increasingly happy and with a deeper foundational joy. I’m beginning to little by little have small glimpses of what God must feel when he sees the world with its joys and its problems. Sometimes your laughter is louder and longer because of the tears that came before. Psalm 126:5 Those who sow in tears shall reap with shouts of joy! |